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296.

India Office London S.W.

16th April 1880

My dear Sir,

A long and painful illness has prevented me from thanking you earlier for the kind present of your Sree Krishna Samhita. By representing Krishna's character and his worship in a more sublime and transcendent light than has hither to been the custom to regard him in you have rendered an essential serivce to your coreligionists, and no one would have taken more delight in your work than my departed friend Goldstucker, the sincerest and most zealous advocate the Hindoos ever had in Europe. I am sending you a number of theэAtheneum containing a notice of his Literary Remains, published last year, as the work may be welcome to many of his old friends in India. I trust you will pardon me for having ventured to draw your attention to it. It would be a good thing, if his views, literary and political were better known and more appreciated in India. I trust you will let me know if I can be of any service to you.

Believe me to remain yours very truly

Reinhold Rest To Babu Kedar nath Dutt Dy. Magistrate

297. Waldo Emerson Saheb could not read Bengali, but he wrote this letter:

10th May 1886 Concord Massachusets

Dear Sir,

I have received with pleasure the book you so kindly sent me. I am sorry that I do not know the language and cannot read it and can only send my thanks.

Emerson.

298. When I published Krishna Samhita the people of this country had many opinions [about it]. Some said that this book was a new point of view. Others said it was good. The younger, educated people said the book was good. But no one could understand the essence of the book. The pupose of this book was to show that Krishna-tattva was transcendental. Some people thought that the entire matter [of the book] was psychological, but they were altogether wrong. There is a subtle difference between aprakrita [transcendental] and adhyatmika [psychological] which generally no one can grasp. Aprakrita has as its basis the absence of speculative knowledge. Kalyana Kalpataru was mostly received with affection and its many verses were sung.

299. While I was living in Narail I took diksha along with my wife. I had been searching for a suitable guru for a long time but I did not find one. I was very unhappy [on that account]. I had done much anxious thinking, and in a dream Prabhu diminished my unhappiness.

300. In the dream I got a hint. That day I became happy. One or two days later Gurudeva wrote to me saying, "I will come quickly and give you diksha." Gurudeva came and Diksha was given. My mind was satisfied. From that very day the sinful reaction from meat eating went from my heart and mercy arose [in me] towards the jivas.

301. You were born in Ranaghat on the 15th of Avin 1880. I saw aspiuoius signs on your body that indicated that later on you would be religious. At this time Sadu had a son. There was something in his appearance which gives rise to the fear of ghosts. When anyone would lay the child down next to you, you would laughingly push hime away. You were born on Sri ekadasi. In a dream I beheld an ugly monkey which came to me and said, "This child is very wicked and it will not live." Then Sri Narada appeared in a dream and said, "The monkey was Kali, do not heed his words. This boy was born on Harivasara [ekadasi]. Taking intiation into the pure Vaihsnava religion he will preach that dharma. No one wil be able to kill him."

302. O Lalita! I hope that you will fulfil the predictions of Narada Gosvami. In this world there is no wealth that can compare to the wealth of dharma. The body lives for just a moment, it is here today and gone tomorrow. Prabhu has been kind to us; out of His mercy He has given His name and the treasure of prema to this world. You will understand this from the sadhu-guru when you are older. Srimad Bhagavatam and Sri Chaitanya Charitamrita are two books that are priceless gems in this world. Make some effort and consider this matter. There is no necessity of exhibiting [mundane] knowledge to this world, [rather] give the treasure of bhakti to the world. Live a sinless live according to religious principles and earn money and support your family and yourself. But never at any time forget the holy name of Krishna.

303. Around the time that I was living in Narail I had a desire to live in Calcutta. I asked Mahendra Mama to arrange for a house there. In those days there was a lot of malaria in Ranaghat, and thus I wanted to live in Calcutta. We have been residents of Calcutta for several generations. Previously I had said that it was impractical to maintain oneself in Calcutta and I had maintained a house in the villages. But [life in] that [particular] village had become difficult and it was better to arrange to have a house in Calcutta than go to another.

304. You and your relatives would live with the greater family. Acquiring knowledge and making money and such things were easy in Calcutta and so also was arranging the marriage of sons and daughters.

305. At this time one [other] thing occurred. I was sick in Narail. Because of the marriage of Kadambani my wife stayed for a few days at the house of Bholanatha Kaka Mahashaya at Pathurayaghat in Calcutta. It was very difficult to stay in Calcutta because we did not have our own house. Realising this, I wished to arrange for a house in Calcutta. Kadambani married Sriman Mani Madhav Mitra. I was not able to attend [the wedding]. Because of my illness everybody returned to Narail after Kadu's wedding. Within a few days [however] I became well.

306. While I was living in Narail Braja Babu of Navadvipa was my Sub Deputy. His activities were pure, but he had no faith in bhakti. I saw Vaishnavas in the area surrounding Narail but all of them were false. Raicharan Gayak and a vaidya [ayurvedic doctor] I saw were pure. On account of my desire to arrange a house in Calcutta I got a three month Priveldge Leave in July of 1881. Abdul Kader came to take over in my absence but was delayed. I knew him from Puri.

307. I rented a house in Calucutta on Nimu Gosai Gali and stayed there with my family. During the rainy season [Sravan] I, my wife and you [Lalita] went on pilgramage along with two servants. My mother-in-law also went along. When we setout we dined etc. at a at a place known as Mokama. In the afternoon we took a train from Moghal Sarai and eventually went to the house of Devendra Vasu at Prayag. At Triveni we performed Sraddha etc. and I came down with a fever. There we met Sitaram, a Brajbasi. Seeing my fever, he cautiously took me to Vrindavan in the reserve train. First we stayed at Kadarya Kunja. Afterwards we went and stayed at the Kala Kunja of Radhamohan. The fever did not go. I prayed to Prabhu, "Let there be fever afterwards, just let me enjoy now. While I am in Vraja let me be happy." Prabhu heard my prayer and the fever departed. From then on I associated with sadhus while in Vraja.

308. We goot good prasada from the Kunja of Lalubabu. We saw Govindaji, Gopinatha and Madan Mohan. We arranged to offer a thali at the Gopinatha temple and there was a dispute [in that regard]. We took prasada at the kunja of Rupadas Babaji and there I received the Dasasloki of Nimbarka. I heard the recitation of Nilamani Gosvami in private. It was there I first saw Sri Jagannatha Babji.

309. Going by palanquin I took darsana of Radhakunda and Govardhana. There I experienced the spitefulness of the Kanjhada [a gang of dacoits] so I made arrangements to stop it. Returning to Vrindavan again I took full darsana. You were a very young child. Due to your constantly eating prasada you passed urine [on the steps] on the way out of Madana Mohan temple.

310. We went to Lucknow from Vrindavan via Mathura. Staying at the residence of a landowner, Raja Kumar, we wandered all around the town. From there we went to Phaijabad, then on to Ayodhya. We returned to Phaijabad in fear of the corrupt pandars [in Ayodhya] before evening and stayed at the residence of one Bengali Babu. The next day we took a bath at Goprat ghat, and that same day we went to Kasi. In Kasi we stayed at the house of Tinu Babu. My mother-in-law was [?] very happy in Kasi. From Kasi we returned to Calcutta to our rented house at Nimu Gosai Gali and everyone was in good health.

311. I stayed a few days in Calcutta and I went and viewed many houses. Because of its suitability I decided on one house in Rambagana. Bholanatha Babu and Mahendra Mama did not like it.

While I was in Narail I was friendly with Commissioner Peacock Saheb. At this time Kamala [Prasada] had a cataract of the eye and Peacock Saheb helped in its removal. I employed Doctor Sanders Saheb for the purpose of excising the cataract. Doctor Sanders was new in Calcutta. He was not [aat all] greedy. Thus, after a few visits I paid him 50 Rupees and thereafter 10 Rupees more. His removal of the cataract was successful, but the vision in Kamala's eye was not cleared.

312. I was transferred to Jashorhara on the 30th of November 1881. At that time, according to my previous promise [the prayer for health while in Vrindavan], I came down with fever. As Peacock Saheb was not around I concluded that in my depressed condition in Jassore I must be experiencing a bad astrological period. Therefore, recongising my inevitable sufferring, while in Jessore I stayed at the residence of Deputy Babu Navin Krihsna Bandhyopadhyaya. My body was weak, and immediately on arriving I got into a dispute with Barton Saheb.

313. The place was execcedingly abominable. Fever had taken its residence in Jassore. At the same time I had problems with my eyes. From my childhood I was short-sighted. I saw well from the left eye but everything looked blurred from my right eye. At that time there was a tiny spot in my eyes. My short sightedness had gone, but my vision was hazy and I had some sort of ache in the eyes.

314. While in Jessore my health was not good and I was not able to work well. Peacock Saheb described my good work to Barton Saheb and Barton Saheb became very affectionate towards me. He took all the work from me except for the treasury duties. Doctor Cummings Saheb examined my eyes and said that my eyes were ailing and I must take leave. I went to Calcutta and had my eyes examined by Kelly [?] Saheb and he gave a certificate recommending Medical Leave. All of my family was living at the rented house on Nimugosai Lane there. I would not allow them to go to Ranaghat. I made a promise that I [?] would stay there [in Calcutta] and buy a house.

315. I showed the certificate from Kelly Saheb [to the authorities] with the certificate from Dr. Cummings, and on 10 January 1882 I obtained three months medical leave. The officer who was to replace me arrived late. When he came I was relieved and went to Calcutta. During this time I treated [the disease] myself and looked for a house to buy. In the end I bought a house for 6000 Rupees from Chandra Kaviraj at 181 Manikatal street. Mehendra Mama did not agree to my taking the house, therefore he would not give me much help. I worked on my own raising the extra cash and I made the house suitable by having repairs done. On the advice of Bholanatha Babu we performed Griha-yajna before we entered the house. Realizing then that the house was good Bholanath Babu and Mahendra Mama had faith [in my decision].

316. Upon coming to the new house my whole family was very happy. Since the time we were in Puri my mother was afraid of getting cataracts. She went to doctors in Calcutta, but all of her relatives prevented her from having an operation because of her old age. I also decided that mother was too old. [I concluded that] there would be no problem for her if we gave her a bathroom [of her own] on the second floor. Although she was living in the new house she was not able to see it, and she suffered [on that account]. Rajani Ma was her private maid. All mother's work was seen to. There was a brahmana cook and my wife served her genuinely. Because everybody was working for her she was very unhappy.

317. I heard that the post in the Sub Divisional Office in Barasat was available. I felt that my eyes were much better and it would be good to reside there. I spoke to Catrel Saheb but he said that he had promised the post to someone else. I went and spoke with Peacock Saheb and he wrote a letter to Catrel Saheb. After a few days I got permission to go to Barasat. I received the order in 1812 on the 12th May. Before that I had taken another three months medical leave because of my eye problem and I spent the best portion of the vacation at Barasat.

318. I received a lot of alopathic medical treatment because of my eye disease and I got general improvement therefrom. Doctor Lalmadhav, Bholanath Babu, and mother all said that I should eat fish again even though I had given it up for a long time. They said eating fish heads daily is good for the health of one's eyes. [The thought] of eating fish after so long was painful. By taking medical treatment from Babu Rajendranath Dattta, aэhomeopath, I improved. I had faith in homeopathic medicine. Rajendranath Babu then considered that there was no necessity for me to eat fish.

319. In Barasat I received charge from the Deputy Collector, Bakimchandra Chaturya. I went there with Radhika and Kamal. We had a very lovely house with a garden and pond in Barasat. I did not bring my wife to Barasat, as usual; whenever I was ill my wife would come. Court was held on Monday in Naihati. Having informed the collector, I used to come home on Saturdays. I would hold court on Monday, and then I would return to Barasat. There were not many cases [to be heard] in Barasat. But there was a great deal of municipal work in Barasat and Naihati.

320. There was a lot of bad natured people in Barasat. In order to draw attention to themselves, they used to create a lot of mischief for me in many ways. Formally, when Lea Saheb was the Sub Divisional Officer in Barasat, there was a program called Athletic Exercise at the time of Sarasvati Pooja. There was also Jatra Gana. Over two years I spent almost 500 Rupees supporting these events. The expenses of the festival were covered by donations. All the important people would attend and the expenses, for the food etc., were paid by the sub divisional officer - me.

321. Naihati was also a difficult place. There were two groups among the Comissioners, of whom Haraprasad Shastri was the chief, and they would quarrel. Their disputes were very difficult to settle. Moreover, the house of my son-in-law, Charu, was in Naihati. One had to be very cautious.

322. I was in Barasat for two years. I continually had to travel in the Maphasal. There was malaria at Barasat, and were I to stay longer [than necessary] there was always the fear of my contracting this disease. I was promoted to the 4th grade of Deputy Magistrates and Deputy Collectors on the 20th of March, 1883.

323. At the end of the year in Barasat I had a man named Kailas Babu [staying] with me. Kailas Babu said that he would read Chaitanya Charitamrita and meet me at my house in Calcutta. He knew a little grammar. At this time, Babu Sarada Charan Mitra, an advocate, purchased some Sanskrit books for me. Among those books were Sri Visvanatha Cakravarti's tikas on the Bhagavad Gita and Srimad Bhagavatam. I had yearned for a devotional commentary on the Gita for many a day. Upon seeing this book Kailas wanted to make a copy. I took the book to Barasat and I gave it to him to make a copy. After two or three months the copy [was complete]. Kailasa's writing was very nice. He was the editor of a newspaper called Aryadarsan.

324. Kailasa made a copy of the Gita and read the Charitamrita. At year's end, during the festival time, a pair of shawls was stolenэfrom the house of Mahendra Mama. Being under suspicion, Kailas fled. [When he left] my Narottama Vilasa went with him. When there is a bad astological period no one is able to counteract it.

325. I became depressed by the rude behaviour of some wicked person of that place stealing the shawls. At this time Annada became mad. While in Narail, as I was teaching Annada the work of the Registry Office, and because I was the Registrar General, I separated Singasopur from the Sub Registry Office in Narail. I appointed Annada the Joint Sub Registar. Later Annada did accounting work as the Sub Registrar in two districts. When he had finished all the work, having requested Norman Saheb at Kurigrama, I arranged for him to be made the Sub Registrar at Ranpur. I sent Annada's wife and daughter there. He became mad, and hearing the news, I sent Mahendra Mama and two other men, released Annada from his duties and brought him to the house in Calcutta.

326. The very day he came to Calcutta he left for his Mama [maternal uncle] Sharata in Majahphabapur. Not knowing where he had gone, everyone became very anxious. While in such anxiety, I asked Peacock Saheb for a transfer. At that time Peacock Saheb was the Secretary, and on the 1st of April, 1884, he gave me a transfer to Sri Rampur.

327. During the time that I was staying in Barasat, in the month of Karttika, 1884, Krishnavinodini was born at the house in Calcutta. There being a daughter after so long, everybody thought this was the last pregnancy. Mother said, "As this is the end, [having] a daughter is good."

328. In Sri Rampur my residence was beside the court. I was going and coming from the house every few days. The reason is that cholera had afflicted the servant named Gopinath in the temporary residence. After a few days I returned to the house. There was a lot of court business in that place. Collier Saheb then was in Sri Rampur. I was the senior Deputy Magishtrate and Nagendra Gupta Babu was the third Magistrate. I came to the house on a Saturday and I satyed in Srirampur on a Monday. Radhika, Kamal and Bimal stayed with me in Srirampur after sometime.

330. In the month of Bhadra of that year my mother died. I received one month priviledge leave on October the 6th, 1884, for the purpose of performing sraddha for her. Annada, who previously had been in Majahpharpur, stayed in Sri Rampur for the first time. He was sent to the village Tiralumayi and was given a bangle [as a talasmin against his mental problems?], but there was no improvement [in his condition].

331. I realized it was my duty to go to Gaya to perform sraddha for my mother. I, my wife, Binu, Haridas Mustophi and Jhapasi, a servant, left our house and went first to Vaidyanath. From there we went to Bakipur and from thence to Gaya. There we stayed in the house of Pasupati Babu. According to custom, on Tuesday the 28th of October we performed Sraddha in Gaya. After seeing the hill known as Ramsila Brahmayoni, we took a train to Pretasila. Vinu [Bimal] sat on Jhapasi's lap. With great effort we climbed to the top of the hill. There were many big buildings there. My great-grandfather, Madan Babu, was well known [for his work there]. There were 395 steps up the hill. At the top of sthe step the name of Madan Mohan Datta was written. Outside my greatgrandfather's temple I saw the inscription of the maker:

332. sri radha-krishnaya namah/

sri chaitanya-chandrodaya namah
sri siva-durga-saranam/ jaya ramah/
ei bara magi prabhu tomara charane/
savamse kusale rakha madan mohane

Following this was this verse:

333.

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